London – New research published by another security expert who coincidently works for an anti anti-virus company (AAV) has declared anti-virus to be really dead. An AAV spokesman said, “We threw everything we could think of at the laptop. chickenpox, foot and mouth, influenza, yellow fever, you name it and none of the products detected it resulting in a pure zero percent detection rate.”
An unnamed employee of a leading anti-virus firm lashed out, stating that the rumours of anti-virus’s demise have been greatly exaggerated and that it is alive and as healthy as a four year old asthmatic… running a marathon… uphill… breathing through a straw.
Twitter has been flooded with opinions with security experts weighing in with their opinions and arguing with each other with much name-calling and finger-pointing. One security expert said he had to log off twitter for fear the echo chamber would explode.